I haven't been away from the children very much. Last year, after 6 years of motherhood, I think I had spent fewer than 8 nights away from the children, total. Now they are a little older, so it should be easier, in theory. Of course, D's travel schedule and the kids' activitiy level make it difficult to find a way for me to get away.
I just spent six nights away for the Baby och Barn mässa in Göteborg, and it was good, but hard. I called once when C had just been reprimanded for something, one of the times where he didn't just laugh and run away, but when he took it (too) seriously. "Ma-(sob)-Ma" he kept saying on the phone. When he calmed down, he managed "Mama come? Mama come night? Mama home?" - enough to take away that sense of freedom I felt and replace it with a few twinges of guilt.
Of course the mässa... that was another matter. As I loaded up a whole moving van of toys, display shelves, tables, bicycles, floor mats, tools, etc., I kept shaking my head in amazement. The last time I moved house without a moving service, somewhere between business school and London, I swore it would be the last time, and it was... until now. Why I felt compelled to move - effectively twice - within six days - is beyond me. And then drive across Sweden? Insane is more like it. A little physical labor is always refreshing, since I spend far too much time at the internet, but I have never been so tired!
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
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